Watching Star Wars in Kansas, a Drama in 3 Acts

Adapted from a Red story by Sunday Girl

ACT 1
Narrator: Here we find Red and her husband TQ attempting to watch the film "Revenge of the Sith." Unfortunately, Red and TQ have chosen to sit in front of some rather rude patrons. Two gentlemen with their young children are making it quite difficult to enjoy the exploits Master Obi Won and his young protege Anakin Skywalker. Let's see how they are doing.

Child 1: (at full volume, with a thick Kansas twang) Dad where's my hot dog?

Father 1: (also at full volume, with a thick Kansas twang) It's in my pocket.

[popcorn munching noises]

Father 2: (chorltles) Huh-huh. R2-D2, huh.

Father 1: That R2-D2 is sure funny. Huh-huh.

Father 2: Huh-huh

[Child 2 is now seen holding the popcorn bag above his head to get the last dregs of kernels from the bottom of the bag]

Child 2: Pa, where do I put my popcorn. I'm done with the bag.

Father 2: Just put it down.

[Crunching noises as Child 2 squishes the popcorn bag. Red looks back annoyed at the rude movie goers.]

ACT II
Narrator: Now we can see that this is not going to be a fun experince for any seasoned film buffs. With a show like this how can anyone watch the movie? As we can see some are not so interested in the love between Anakin and Padme as they are of others in the audience.

[Child 1 and Child 2 are shown separated by their fathers and getting bored with the film]

Child 2: (leaning over the seats, still speaking at full volume) How's it going?

Child 1: I'm all right. Are you enjoying the movie?

Father 1: (You betcha it's at full volume) Dakota. Watch the movie.

ACT III
Narrator: Now we can see that Red and TQ are at the height of annoyance, but just when you think things are at their worst, fate always seems to have one more twist to throw at you.

[A cell phone rings playing the circus song]

Father 2: (do I even have to mention this is at full volume) Hello. I'm at the movies. Star Wars. Yeah. Yep. I'll be getting that part tomorrow. Yeah. I'll get to it tomorrow. You take care now. Bye.

[At this point Red and TQ have gone beyond the boiling point. Red spots two empty seats far away from the yakking yokels.]

Red: TQ, there are two seats we need to move now.

[They move]

Fin.